WIN PRIZES!!!

Keep sending in your favourite jokes, riddles and poems. WeÕll print the best ones in the next magazine and you could win a fantastic VTTN prize!

Write to: -
ÔBang OnÕ
English Now
British Council
40 Cat Linh
Hanoi

Congratulations to Ms Nguyen Thi Xuan Thuy from Hue. She wins a prize for her thoughts on Reasoning published in issue 7 of English Now.

Tran Quoc Thao from Daklak sent us this little brainteaser and some riddles!
What numbers?
What are the missing numbers in the following sequence?

1 My fatherÕs son is not my brother. Who is he?
2 WhatÕs the worst weather for mice and rabbits?
3 WhatÕs black and white and red all over?
4 What letter makes a road broad?
5 What letter of the alphabet surrounds Great Britain?

Answer at the bottom of the page!

Elephant Jokes!
Q: How can you tell if an elephant is under your bed?
A: Your nose is on the ceiling!
Q: If you see an elephant on your bike, what time is it?
A: Time to get a new one!

Quote:
With a good teacher, students will learn, and they will love and respect their teacher. With a great teacher, they will learn to love and respect themselves.Õ

Joke:
The science teacher asks Jimmy to prove the laws of gravity, so he throws the teacher out the window!

Chau Thi Kim Loan from
Can Tho sent in this very nice poem!

Poem
The sun kisses the sky in the morning
To say good morning!
A new day begins.

The sky kisses the sun in the evening

To say Ôgoodbye!Õ
A hard working day ends.

The birds fly in the morning to say Ôhi!Õ
And fly home in the evening to say ÔBye bye!Õ

ThatÕs Life!
I hate saying ÔbyeÕ but love saying ÔhiÕ.
Though I know life is ÔhiÕ and ÔbyeÕ.

Hilarious jokes from Hai Ba Trung School, Hue City.
Collected and sent in by Tran thi Ai Thanh.

Joke box!
1) Little Billy had just started school. When he returned home after the first day, his mum asked
'Billy, what did you learn today?'
'I learned to write!' Billy said proudly.
'Good boy Billy! And what did you write exactly?'
'Dunno mum, you see, I havenÕt learn to read yet!'

2) 'Sam! Why are you standing in front of the mirror with you eyes closed?'
'Well, I wanna see what I look like when IÕM ASLEEP!'

3) 'Doctor doctor! IÕve broken my arm in two places!'
'Well donÕt go to those places again!!'

4) A doctor gives a patient three weeks to live, but the patient canÕt pay his bill, so the doctor gives him another three.

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